Hyouka Drama CD 1 – Chuunibyou of the Four Families4 min read
This is from the translation group I’m currently in, Hyouka Sentai Kotenrangers or HSK for short. This one wasn’t translated by me but by my friend, and we’re trying to get as much Hyouka fans to read the translations as much as we can, so here we go! Follow us on Tumblr!
Hyouka Drama CD Volume 1
Track 01. Chuunibyou of the Four Families
Chitanda: I am Chitanda Eru.
Satoshi: Chi-Chitanda-san? You don’t mean, THE Chitanda-san?
Houtarou: Do you know of them?
Satoshi: Houtarou, you mean to tell me you’ve never heard of the Chitanda family? There aren’t many wealthy and distinguished families in Kamiyama City, but if you were to hear their names, you’d recognize them from those notorious families.
Houtarou: Ohh? She’s from those four families?
Satoshi: The Juumonji family of the Arekusu Shrine, the Sarusuberi Family of the Small Shrines, the Chitanda Family of Wealthy Farmers, and the Manninbashi Family of the Mountain Owners. There is one representative for each family. People call them the Four Families.
*Sliding door opens*
Kaho: That is correct!
Chitanda: Kaho-san!
Houtarou: Who’re you?
Satoshi: Unbelievable! It’s her!
Kaho: Correct. I am Juumonji Kaho! Among the Four Families, I will take control of the Juumonji Family.
Houtarou: Take control?
Kaho: Chitanda Eru! I told you two or three years ago that the day we’d settle the true ruler of Kamiyama City would come. Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten?
Houtarou: How approximate.
Chitanda: Of course I remember, Kaho-san. I have feared the arrival of this day. As a woman of the Chitanda clan, I knew the day would come where I’d have to fight you.
Houtarou: You’re going to fight?
Chitanda: But now, I will not cower. We will settle this once and for all. Juumonji Kaho, I, Chitanda Eru, accept your challenge!
Satoshi: So old-fashioned!
Kaho: Then, here I come with the my Fortune Telling Sorcery. Chitanda Eru, allow me to break through your Electric Barriers and turn them into fertilizer!
Chitanda: Kkh!
Kaho: The Juumonji Family’s Ansatsu Suujutsu, [t/n: Assasination Numerology] Succession technique: Hell Crusaders!!
Houtaoru: Whoa!
Satoshi: Amazing! The room is engulfed in darkness, and now there’s a huge army charging at Chitanda!
Houtarou: In the clubroom?
Satoshi: And now, Chitanda’s formed an invisible barrier, and narrowly stopped their charge!
Houtarou: A barrier?
Chitanda: Impressive as always, Kaho-san.
Kaho: How’s that? The might of the Hell Crusaders comes from each letter of the word Crusaders. The Kanji is read as: “Hell Crusaders”!!
[t/n: the word for Crusaders in Japanese is 十字軍 which means 10 Letter Army]
Houtarou: Oh, like your name, Juumonji. [t/n: translated separately, Juumonji means Ten Written Words]
Kaho: HELL CRUSADERS!
Houtarou: Gotcha!
Chitanda: But…I will not lose!
Kaho: Gah-!
Satoshi: Chitanda-san’s barrier has broken free from Kaho’s attack!
Houtarou: Hm!
Chitanda: Let me show you why I am known as the “Bloody Farmer.”
Houtarou: Is that supposed to be a surname?
Chitanda: For every letter in the name, Senketsu no Noufu, the Bloody Farmer…. [t/n: 鮮血の農婦, senketsu no noufu means Bloody Farmer]
Houtarou: We get it already!
Chitanda: The Chitanda Family Wealthy Farmer Succession Technique: Written in Kanji, Senjin no Kobushi!!! But read as A THOUSAND FISTS! UWOOOOOOOOO!!!!
-Sound effects of Chitanda doing a technique similar to the Fist of the North Star anime-
Satoshi: Thousands of fists are resonating from Chitanda!
Chitanda: A-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta…or was it…o-ra-ra-ra…or was it…
Houtarou: Where’ve I heard those shouts before?
Chitanda: Shi-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta…!
Houtarou: Oh, enough already!
Satoshi: Amazing! Juumonji-san is cowering back!
Kaho: I…I’m actually getting hit…!
Chitanda: The likes of you, Juumonji, are no match for me.
Kaho: Are you saying your ‘Chi’ and my ‘Juu’ are that different? [t/n: literally says is a thousand and a ten really so different]
Chitanda: You could say that.
Kaho: Curses…curse you, Chitanda Eru! Eru! Eru is the L from Lip! [t/n: a pun?] UUOOOOOOOO!!!
Chitanda: I win!
Kaho: And I lose…
Satoshi: Loser, Juumonji Kaho.
Houtarou: Is she dead?
Satoshi: Match over!
—-
Togaito: Manninbashi-sama, Sarusuberi-sama. Juumonji Kaho has been eliminated by Chitanda Eru.
Sarusuberi: Splendid, Togaito. Now step back.
Togaito: Yes!
Manninbashi: So Juumonji’s been defeated.
Sarusuberi: But Juumonji’s the weakest of the four. Manninbashi-sama, I, Sarusuberi, will go forth.
Manninbashi: Very well, I look forward to the beheading of Chitanda, the Wealthy Farmer.
Sarusuberi: Please leave it to me.
-Both laugh and scoff-
Manninbashi: *clears throat* Maybe that’s enough laughing.
Sarusuberi: …Yeah.
—-
Chitanda: To NOT be continued!
Houtarou: Thank god.
